Review Terminator: Salvation

Year: 2009
Director: McG (Dickish name)
Screenplay: John D. Brancato and Michael Ferris
Starring: Christian Bale, Anton Yelchin, Sam Worthington, Bryce Dallas Howard, Moon Bloodgood, Common, Helena Bonham Carter, Micheal Ironside

Plot (what there is of it) is here.

Terminator: Salvation reminded me of my favorite footy team Arsenal (shut up!) and their 08/09 season. Forth is well placed, respectable and better than most. However I'd rather be winning the league. That's the best allegory I could come up with and I feel it's better than the Christ imagery that is placed in this forth installment (it's laid on thick).

I've realized for a little while that the narrative within Hollywood blockbuster is slowly imploding in front of my eyes. Gimmicks (3-D, Imax and the like) are becoming the in thing and the executives are slowly beginning to get what they wanted: hyper edited, kiddy friendly (read: toy friendly) franchises which are more a series of moments than an actual full length story. I've realized this and I'm begrudgingly coming round to Hollywood's way of thinking. The days of Jaws, Star Wars and the like are gone. I get it and I'm almost kinda fine with it.

Terminator Salvation has no real plot and the tiny bit it has is shoved in right at the end to try and make people believe that the film makes complete sense etc. It's all very silly. Never the less McG succeeds in making a watchable sci-fi action movie that managed to keep my attention for the most part. Terminator canon is messier than a baby eating pasta sauce and T4 will not improve things. BUT and it's a big one here If you want good action, a ton of bravado and some smart effects McG is your man.

After a ludicrous prologue involving a prisoner named Marcus, T4 goes into full swing. jumping from action sequence to action sequence with unabashed pride. Memories of the pile of LSD fuelled piece of shit that was Charlies Angels 2: Full Throttle, left me extremely quickly. For me McG has matured as an action director and gives us some strong set pieces that would have Micheal Bay nodding in approval. You wanna blow some shit up? Ask the 'G' Man.

If only they had the writing to back it up. John D. Brancato and Michael Ferris (the writers of Catwoman...jesus) have taken on a franchise which unfortunately very difficult to continue on with. Despite the film blabbering about fate being in their hands and that, the roles have already been predetermined. In fact this and Rise of the machines (also watchable enough despite it's dubious tone) have cause a hellish timeline loop which has Kyle Reese (played in this by an energetic Anton Yelchin) royally boned. This should be an undetermined future for these characters however, the source material will not allow this. Why? Because of who they are. It's hard to see any thing happening to John Conner and Reese because like Wolverine, we know their future. Because of this, it's hard to truly love the good work McG has put forth. We kinda know they will pull though so why care? Take away the Terminator elements, a bit of re-tooling and we have a brand new franchise. Oh well.

Some of the other elements work better. Despite a hokey beginning, Sam Worthington's character of Marcus is a strong one. A man whose lost his sense of identity and is the only character who has more free will than the other supposed main characters. Worthington slips into the role well and I honestly didn't pick up on his Oz accent. it's a shame that the films marketing (and writing) ruins the film only interesting plot twist. Moon Bloodgood has a silly name but is an interesting side character who could be given given a good story in the sequel (not a spoiler as the fifth film is just waiting for a good box office report)

Christian Bale's display is harder to nail down. There's a lot of ballsy yelling but Bale's Connor is a very flat creature. However despite this odd lack of conviction, a mediocre Bale is better than well....a lot of actors. He still holds a hell of a lot of screen presence, which is more than I can say for Common and Bryce Dallas Howard...who can claim the crown of king and queen of non-entities (your pregnant...and? your fucking purpose?). Helena Bonham Carter and Micheal Ironside are placed in roles that pay the bills. Nothing spectacular but not shite. In fact Ironside is clearly channelling Jean Rasczak which is something I have no problem with.

Terminator: Salvation could have done with some story tweaks but the film is what it is; dumb summer action. When it's not shoehorning "homages" into scenes for no reason or trying to explain plot it's pretty damn watchable (if a little bit forgettable). When the fifth film makes it's appearance, it could do worse than having McG on board, who, despite having a stupid name, is competent enough to make a well paced (until the last third but that's a writing thing again) action flick which is for the most part fun. So much like Arsenal....pretty to look at but not a complete package. 4th is ok....it qualifies*.

*To those across the pond who don't "do" football.....It's means we get into the champions league.

Note: I'm am fucked off that both this film and Rise of the machines have rendered the death of Miles Dyson useless. Skynet's face should have been his for shitz and giggles.

Trailers: Gamer, New Moon, Pontypool , Toy Story 3

Gamer:


In watching the trailer I could only think of two things; The running man and Avalon. The Running Man (The Stephen King adaptation with Arnie in) people may be aware of, but few may have heard of the bizarre, visually stunning (although a little dull) Japanese flick made in 2001 by Mamoru Oshii (creator of Ghost in the shell). Gamer reminds me alot of Avalon and that's not too much of a bad thing. However Avalon is a rather ponderous film with a pace that requires you to do a bit of thinking. Gamer (made by the nutters behind Crank) will probably leave that thinking nonsense to Stephen Hawking. Looks like stupid, derivative nonsense, could be a laugh.


New Moon:



Thank God these people are pretty....because they sure can't act! Like Harry Potter, the twilight saga only needs to have people that look good/like the characters to be successful. However while the potter books have interesting elements to them, The twilight films come across as fan fiction from a 13 year old who wants her panties wet. I did see the first film to see what the fuss was about...and found it to be quite a bore. Even if the movie is not aimed at me as the target audience it could have still been...you know...entertaining. New Moon is more of the same. Robert Patterson straining his eyes and calling it acting while Kristen Stewart looks dumbfounded in every shot. Yes I'm being harsh on the teen movie but doesn't matter what i think. The film is critic proof and the fans will flock to see it even it was a two hour picture of Edward Cullen taking a shit. Each to his own.

Pontypool:


After hearing a review of this on the filmjunk podcast I was more than a little intrigued about this film. I'm sure it will only get a limited review but the idea of people turning into Zombies because of language? Fucking weird but it gets me going. The trailer....meh, doesn't give much away, but it's a film that wants to play with the sub genre a bit...and there is nothing wrong with that.


Toy Story 3:


It's been 15 years since the first toy story and while that thought alone has got me wondering what I've fucking done with my life, it's also had me realize the power Pixar has had over the animated world. These guys are 10 for 10 and the Toy story movies are two of the brightest Jewels in their crown. Yes it's just a teaser but I can't see me having one once of hate for this one.

Review: Drag Me To Hell

Year: 2009
Director: Sam Raimi
Screenplay: Sam Raimi and Ivan Raimi
Starring: Alison Lohman, Justin Long

Film Synopsis is here

I'm not going to talk about Sam Raimi's last film because you know...it's been spoken about enough. I will say I was surprised that Raimi decided to jump back the genre that made him famous. It's been a very long time since his last entry and I thought he'd be placing script touches on a comic book character that I'll say not too much about (this is not to say i minded the third film it was just weak).

I had so many reservations about Drag me to hell, most of them stemming from an "ok" trailer and the hyperbole posters/T.V spots that I began to see all over the place. I wanted to watch the film but when I'm told that the film is a "return to form" and my most hated word in film (next to overrated) a "masterpiece" I felt that this is a lot of praise for a film that looked pretty underwhelming to me at first glance.

Well Sam Raimi must knew that there would be assholes like me that may watch this by shutting my mouth in the first ten minutes. Drag me to hell is a horror film that pulls no punches from the start. The film is unrelenting from the start, giving us a frantic set up that reminds us of the best of Raimi. He had me from the start I tell you, and I tell you what, it's been a long time since I've seen a horror movie with such big brass balls. When a child is dragged into the depths of hell within the opening scene I know I'm going to love the movie.

It's ballsy scenes like that which place a film like this above the glut of horror remakes/reboots. It's willing to go against the gain and display imagination. That dreadful feeling of "been there done that" is missing from Raimi's film with it's possessed hankies and nose bleed fountains. While the film's style owes a lot the films which made it's director famous, it never feels derivative of a certain infamous trilogy that came before it. In fact it's so fresh i kinda hope people start to nick from it; be it the crazy tilted angles to the vast amount of gross out moments. It's what's needed to cut through the dreary dead teenager movies that have been trust upon us.

The films shocks (and there's a few) are not only creative but effective. I'm not a fan of horror zingers (jump scares) has I find them to be cheap, especially in one note films like A Haunting in Connecticut. With this said, Raimi's jump moments are cranked with so much tension he pulls of the scares with ease. The bizarre camera shots, the fantastic use of sound to create anxiety (and not just for boo moments) even make the scenes in the day time feel....odd. This is a director having fun with himself as well as the audience and it shows.

Another thing it has in common with Raimi's earlier movies is the comedy that counterbalance the horror. The film is so damn funny I had tears running down my face. Yes the films scares are well constructed but it's the slapstick (morbid) humor that comes after that really won me over. With more money and a hell of a lot more freedom Raimi is once again allowed to torture his lead (Lohman at her most innocent and sympathetic) and does so with gusto. It's been a while since I've seen him in this sort of mood and to see it again is nothing short of awesome. It's a mood that gives us a story that doesn't have to resort to a high body count to give us horror.

After 22 years Raimi goes back to the pure genre movies that made him famous and I found it the best comic horror I've seen in ages. It's definitely the best horror film I've seen this year, and will take some beating. In an era of some of the most dull uninspired American Horror on offer, I found Drag me to hell to be the kick up the arse the genre needed. Raimi brings forth a film that's not only laugh out loud funny but filled with more than enough shocks for repeat viewing. I only ask for one thing....when is it out on DVD?

Review: Tormented

Year: 2009
Director: Jon Wright
Screenplay: Stephen Prentice
Starring: Alex Pettyfer, April Pearson, Larissa Wilson, Tom Hopper

I should watch more TV but I don't. I get bored of TV shows quite easily and the glut of American serials have left me exasperated. There's only so many bad days Jack Bauer can have, you know? But there are a few things I like watching and Skins is one of them. Yes it's exaggerated, but the energy placed within the show wither it's the writing or the performance is clearly visible. Compere that to the deary cop shows (except The Wire of course) and the never ending questions/red herrings of certain other shows and I'll take my OTT Teen show thanks. Cheesy yes but pretentious? Not at all.


This brings me to Tormented which as already been labeled a "skins slasher". I had my reservations of course mostly as it's very lazy hyperbole. It has a couple of actors from Skins in it and it's a horror film. A very easy conclusion for a writer who merely can't be arsed to write about some horror film (maybe).

However in watching Tormented you actually realize that although Skins has "opened a door" for this British slasher, a lot of the movies cues are "like er... totally American". Yes the film is about a bullied teen who comes back to live to reap havoc, however the film borrows so much from Halloween you could constitute it as theft.

This didn't bother me however as the film has more than enough character of it's own. It's themes of bullying, social isolation (both by peers and technology) and that bastard that is puberty are placed right into the forefront. It's nothing you haven't seen before but it's well done. In fact the fact that Tormented puts so much effort into these elements places it leap years in front the remakes and reboots that Hollywood drudges up. However, Tormented suffers from one thing....it's not scary.

The film doesn't reach the dizzying horror heights of genre classics such as Evil Dead or Scream because none of the films set pieces are particularly frightening. They're funny in a Final Destination sort of way but your not going to get nightmares from it. In fact the films bullying scenes are much more terrifying but while they're extremely OTT, there's a eerie aura of truth that lingers around those moments.

From the first kill I was disappointed because the film didn't sent any shivers down my spine. However the films humor kept me going. The dialogue was snappy while the set pieces was full of extreme gore that no one could take seriously. The film also has a streak of cynicism that's been missing from so many horror films lately, that it took me by surprise. Trust us Brits to put the some bitterness back into horror. I was also happy that the film also had a plot, which another thing that's missing from alot of modern horror.

The youthful cast are effective for the most part, April Pearson and Alex Pettyfer play their parts with the right amount of misanthropy while the lead Tuppence Middleton is very likable. Tom Hopper makes sure his performance is more than just gruff muscle (he has the funniest death sequence). Unfortunately Larissa Wilson (Skin's Jal) doesn't have much to do, while the films "nice guy" (can't remember the guys name) comes off a little too awkward.

Tormented hits the mark because due to it's biting comments and comical set pieces. If some of our friends across the border took notice of this then they'd be producing horror movies that I'd remember and actually buy on DVD. Tormented has the right amount of nastiness and laughs that I can see myself watching it on my Xbox before going out on the razz. Well played.

Dreamworks to make Martin Luther King biopic

A little while back I was blogged about Presidents and the movies that cropped up in their career. I didn't say too much about what we may see in Obama's term(s) however this bit of breaking news says quite alot.

Spielberg/Dreamworks/Martin Luther King - 1
Spielberg/Dreamworks/Martin Luther King - 2

Now may mean shit to a lot of people but to me it means a bit. Why?

The Malcolm X Film.

A quick glance to wikipedia gives you a quick insight into the amount of production issues that came with the movie.

But now in the realm of a biracial president it doesn't come to any surprise to me that not only the King estate have finally agreed to this, but a studio like Dreamworks look set to finance the film with Spielberg's name behind it on the producing side of things. Especially as this film annoucement as came so quickly within Obama's reign.

My questions now are:

Whose gonna direct this?
Will Spike Lee go nuts about the directors colour

But most importantly

Will this be a powerful, honest portyal of a life thats been way overdue?

Only time will tell