Year: 2009 (2010 U.K Release)
Director: Rob Marshall
Screenplay: Michael Tolkin and Anthony Minghella
Starring: Daniel Day Lewis, Nicole Kidman, Penople Cruz, Marion Cotillard, Judi Dench, Kate Hudson, Sophia Loren
Frederico Fellini's 8 1/2 is a wonderful, abstract film which shows a director at his most playful. Nine is another bland musical from Rob Marshall which is based on a theater show, which liberally borrows (i.e nicks) from Fellini's feature. While I haven't seen the stage musical, if this is anything to go by I'm happy I saw 8 1/2 first.
Fellini's film was sexy without being overtly sexual, stylish without being overly stylized and filled with content that melded dreamscapes with reality in a blink of an eye. It's a film that just washed over me and not only left me entertained but inspired (not that I could write anything as lucid as Fellini). Nine lacks the joy of the film that came before it, in fact the film is merely a pre-meditated attack on the awards season, stuffing the film with statue winners while neglecting everything else.
As a musical, it has no memorable songs. In fact they're not even interesting songs. The tunes are more likely to have aficionados ho-humming than just humming. As a regular film, it lacks the subtly that resided within the original film, with any poignant moments cut short by these musical numbers. These numbers are jarring, state the obvious and desperately try and hide the fact that Nine is trying to make a surreal film more conventional. Marshall's overall direction of the story is mediocre to say the least and the mixture of the unengaged drama and music don't mesh as well as they should. In fact I'm struggling now to remember any worth while scenes, such is the unremarkable telling of story.
It's not all bad I guess, there's some cute references to Fellini and his legacy and the performances by anyone with more than five minutes screen time do their best with the material. In fact, despite only being in the film for about ten minutes, Kate Hudson puts in a turn with more verve than anything she's done in the last ten years.
Unfortunately, it was all at a loss for me. In my opinion Nine lacked the energy as well as the mischievous of it's cinematic origin. Hell, it didn't even have the kinetic flair of Baz Luhrmann's far superior Moulin Rouge whose combination of romance, pop songs and dance number is still a spectacle to behold. Nine asked me to be Italian. Unfortunately for Marshall, the Italians were much better at the questioning.
Note: While I know that the film is based on a stage musical,however, during the credits, I don't remember the film saying anything about Frederico Fellini or 8 1/2. This says a lot about how Hollywood views film history at the best of times, taking imagery and reference from a filmmaker and not even crediting him in the main credits. It your going to mangle a man's film at least state who he is.
Saturday, 2 January 2010
Thursday, 31 December 2009
THE YEAR THAT WAS 2009
It was a shit year for movies...
I heard this ever so much. It was a phase that rang through my ears constantly. However, my fellow readers, you will not hear it from me. In fact I don’t fully believe in “bad years” for movies. My reasoning isn’t great but hear me out:
This year I watched over 80 movies at the cinema, and had more than enough movies to make a shortlist for my top ten. Of course there were the other movies that I found not so hot but as always the Bad didn’t outweigh the good, and until the day I struggle to create a top ten list of favourites (which I doubt considering how many films I watch) then I can’t see there ever being a “bad year”.
Of course not everyone has the time or wish to watch as many movies as myself and may only get to watch what really interests them. The problem I find however seems to be that so many people don’t truly search out films that could interest them, or films that could SURPRISE them. I mean what’s so wrong with watching something a little different?
So to those who were “disappointed” with the year I say this: It’s not always the filmmakers fault that you picked more movies that you disliked than liked. These days over 40 films are released during a month and yes, it is difficult for people to pick out some of the most independent titles, but the internet has opened up so many more outlets for people to watch, download (not illegally), stream and rent movies that it’s coming more and more impossible for a cinephile NOT have a bad year.
We as consumers have the choice to seek out a range of films that we can enjoy as opposed to being spoon fed with say another Hollywood remake or Comic Book sequel. For me, I had a blast. I haven’t seen so many movies in years and if I can equal or beat that amount next year that will be grand. If by some unfortunate circumstances I see more bad films than good I still won’t care. Why?
The Good movies will be brought, re-watched and live within my memory forever. The bad will be forgotten as soon as I leave the cinema (after the review). So without further ado shall we get on to the list?
My Ten Favourite Films of the year (No Order):
Note that I use the term favourite as these films are personal to me and not the “best” of the year. To claim that the movies that affected me the most, when discussing something as subjective as film is extremely pompous.
Note that I use the term favourite as these films are personal to me and not the “best” of the year. To claim that the movies that affected me the most, when discussing something as subjective as film is extremely pompous.
Horror comedy is difficult to do well and easy to fail at. Rami is of course an old hand at this and his rollercoaster ride of tension and laughs beat out any horror entry that poke it’s head out during 2009. Hated by many expecting a different beast entirely...Those who remember and loved the lighter side of Ash Williams and Co were completely down with this horror with humor combo. Also Possessed Goats are made of win.
Cynicism is rife with me when it comes to the Romantic Comedy. Quite simply, the genre doesn’t try hard enough and insults the intelligence of its fans constantly. Here however, was a quick shot in the arm of the bride wars, bridget jones and the sex in the citys that we constantly witness. Humor that stems from the characters, feelings that come from a truth place and characters that I can root for. The date movie never had it so good.
Quite simply the gutsiest movie of the year. Cameron’s Avatar may have the visuals but his ex-wife Bigalow has the tension and the drama. A sublimely crafted action feature.
Many have bemoaned that the motormouth “can’t write” any more. I don’t think it’s that, I think his writing is evolving and just not appealing to the people who are looking for pulp fiction 2. Tarantino’s film is in love with language, movies and storytelling. He also adds to this some of his best scenes this side of Pulp fiction and one of the writer directors best characters (handsomely played by Christopher Waltz) to date. Not only War as fiction but war as fun, something that shouldn’t be able to be done considering the connotations...and yet he surprised me again.
The pulsing soundtrack, the claustrophobic visuals, its grand themes and a lead performance from Sam Rockwell that would get awards if I could rig the ceremonies. Duncan Jones brings us Sci-fi that the 70’s used to make. An arresting film that well and truly knocked me for six. Somewhere Stanley Kubrick is Smiling.
With scenes that carry more pathos than many of the movies I watched this year. Pixar once again bring us a family film with thought. Ratatouille, Wall-e and now UP have made sure that Pixar make the leap from best animated film contenders....to best picture contenders.
The Coens are having yet another fabulous run of movies, playing with the ideals of fate. This movie decides that even God great plan should be knocked about for a laugh. Full of Coen’s black humour, great performances from a relatively unknown cast and a plot that plays with fatalism in a way that only these two bothers can.
Due to Hollywood’s dominance in the U.K we often forget that we Brits even make movies let alone good ones, Andrea Arnold (and Moon’s Duncan Jones) wishes to change all that. With her kinetic kitchen sink-esque Drama that many have felt evoked the spirit of Loach (not that he’s dead). Arnold’s film is culturally astute, beautifully realised and features the combustible chemistry of Newcomer Katie Jarvis and Irish chameleon Michael Fassbender (also great in Basterds). A mesmerising second feature.
Problems overcome and emotions found in Spike Jonez once troubled feature. A film with not only a wonderful looks but a true nostalgic feel of childhood. Max Record’s difficult character is easy to love while the fantastically created wild things reminded me of those conflicting issues that I had as a child. The film brings a nostalgic feeling given without the need for branded toys or well known television characters, but with the fact that everyone is bigger than you and can change their emotions in a blink of an eye from fun to dangerous without you knowing why. To capture this mixture of fear, joy and amazement is a difficult one but it's one that Jonez handles with aplomb.
Likened to Spinal Tap but could really be a companion piece to Metallica: Some Kind of Monster, Anvil is a loving tribute to following your dreams no matter what. Many have watch these two aging rockers playing young ‘uns and considered them sad. But if other Musicians still had has much hunger and passion as these guys at the age they are there’s be even more great music going. The film also has one of the most loving relationships I saw captured this year. How the wives cope with these two is beyond me.
HONOURABLE MENTIONS
The Wrestler, Frost/Nixon, Observe and Report, District 9, Me and Orson Welles
Sherlock Holmes, Fantastic Mr Fox
HONOURABLE MENTIONS
The Wrestler, Frost/Nixon, Observe and Report, District 9, Me and Orson Welles
Sherlock Holmes, Fantastic Mr Fox
Review: Sherlock Holmes
Year: 2009
Director: Guy Richie
Screenplay: Michael Robert Johnson, Anthony Peckham, Simon Kinberg
Starring: Robert Downley jr, Jude Law, Rachel McAdams, Mark Strong
I remember when the idea of this was first announced. I could almost hear the furious tapping of keyboards from angry purists. Irate that the "hack" that is Guy Richie has decided to lay his grubby mitts (he did have relations with Madonna) on one of England's classic icons. I bet a few hard drives burned due to how angry some of the forum posts got (my knowledge of computer tech showing there).
And here we are...about a year and a bit (maybe less) since we heard the news of a new "re-imaging" in the works. It comes out at Christmas and is stopped from hitting the top spot by Jimmy Cameron and his blue people. The thing is despite all the rooftop yelling about "game-changing" effects and the like....it was Richie's down and dirty re-envisioning of Holmes that I enjoyed all the more.
The reason behind this lies in it's script and narrative. Both films talk utilize the ideals of fear and force in order to control the "bewildered herd" that is the masses. Both are very stylized in their execution and both are made by directors who really know their target audience (teens to mid twenties methinks). I went into both films knowing little about the navi and not that much more about Holmes (yes, i know, shocking). However, after watching both I realized that Richie's film has created a world I want to know more about and characters who really, truly grew on me. In Avatar I still don't know that much about Jim's blue people nor do I care. Richie hasn't been in the game as long as the King of the world, but it's becoming great to see that how quickly he learns.
I could see Holmes becoming a catastrophe of Swept Away proportions had Richie decided to write the piece by himself. Sensing his limitations, it seems the script falls to a trio of individuals who combine their talents to create a screenplay that keeps the essentially of what Holmes is all about (and not just a hat and pipe) but jazzes the the idea of Holmes and Victorian England just right. Yes it's more "entertaining" but it's not insulting and that's the key. The dialogue fizzes, the themes are very much a product of our time but it still has the essence of the era. It's also FUN. To watch Watson and Holmes irate each other like husband and fishwife is amusing but it's also endearing. It's "bromance" (hate that word) that harks back to when we called it the buddy movie. The characters on the page gel well making the actors' life not only easier but so much more enjoyable.
Whoever decided upon placing Downley jr as Holmes deserves a bottle of champers because he is a delight to watch. A man whose intelligence is both a blessing and a curse. Downley jr loses a few of the well known tics to bring about a Holmes whose not smug, but merely frustrated with the supposed challenges placed in front of him. This is a more jovial Holmes than I can think of, and it's the charm of the actor who plays him that brings it about. His foil comes in the shape of Jude Law who hasn't been this interesting since Closer. He craftily balances a character who is not only quite handy in a fight but is every so slightly a bit camp. There's a touch of effeminacy that tries to keep Holmes' man-child in check. It's all very humorous but it's also the reason why we care about what happens to them. At one point Holmes makes light that Dr Watson's career might be at stake but it's important to Holmes that it's not tarnished because of the relationship they have. It's these tiny things that build up the sakes in the film. It's a shame that Rachel McAdams's role is underdeveloped. It is also appears to be obvious that she is placed within the film as American draw to what is quite an English affair, because despite RDJ being transatlantic, has a nice enough English accent . Also, kudos to another solid Mark Strong effort he is the right side of slimy.
How about Richie tackling all this on his biggest movie to date? He handles it surprisingly well. After the deary Rock n Rolla, and Revolver (hated by everyone but liked by me), Richie is back to making bouncy British affairs which are made for cheeky smirks and wide grins. The film is filled with CSI edited clue finding and CGI set pieces. But Richie still manages to keep a sense of fun about the proceedings. At times it gives off the feeling of an old school Bond film, and while I may of offended a multitude of people by saying that I found it true, it has that sense of adventure about it.
That sense which was strangely missing from the big bright flashy lights of Avatar, a film that feels more like a feature to admire than to enjoy. Here we have the opposite, a film that wouldn't mind being called a flick. A film with a smart script that retains that popcorn munching feeling. I would say that Sherlock Holmes is more than elementary, but of course, this is not Paul Ross' blog site.
Note: I gotta say however, from Baker Street to Tower Bridge that fast? Really? You can't fool me guys.
Director: Guy Richie
Screenplay: Michael Robert Johnson, Anthony Peckham, Simon Kinberg
Starring: Robert Downley jr, Jude Law, Rachel McAdams, Mark Strong
I remember when the idea of this was first announced. I could almost hear the furious tapping of keyboards from angry purists. Irate that the "hack" that is Guy Richie has decided to lay his grubby mitts (he did have relations with Madonna) on one of England's classic icons. I bet a few hard drives burned due to how angry some of the forum posts got (my knowledge of computer tech showing there).
And here we are...about a year and a bit (maybe less) since we heard the news of a new "re-imaging" in the works. It comes out at Christmas and is stopped from hitting the top spot by Jimmy Cameron and his blue people. The thing is despite all the rooftop yelling about "game-changing" effects and the like....it was Richie's down and dirty re-envisioning of Holmes that I enjoyed all the more.
The reason behind this lies in it's script and narrative. Both films talk utilize the ideals of fear and force in order to control the "bewildered herd" that is the masses. Both are very stylized in their execution and both are made by directors who really know their target audience (teens to mid twenties methinks). I went into both films knowing little about the navi and not that much more about Holmes (yes, i know, shocking). However, after watching both I realized that Richie's film has created a world I want to know more about and characters who really, truly grew on me. In Avatar I still don't know that much about Jim's blue people nor do I care. Richie hasn't been in the game as long as the King of the world, but it's becoming great to see that how quickly he learns.
I could see Holmes becoming a catastrophe of Swept Away proportions had Richie decided to write the piece by himself. Sensing his limitations, it seems the script falls to a trio of individuals who combine their talents to create a screenplay that keeps the essentially of what Holmes is all about (and not just a hat and pipe) but jazzes the the idea of Holmes and Victorian England just right. Yes it's more "entertaining" but it's not insulting and that's the key. The dialogue fizzes, the themes are very much a product of our time but it still has the essence of the era. It's also FUN. To watch Watson and Holmes irate each other like husband and fishwife is amusing but it's also endearing. It's "bromance" (hate that word) that harks back to when we called it the buddy movie. The characters on the page gel well making the actors' life not only easier but so much more enjoyable.
Whoever decided upon placing Downley jr as Holmes deserves a bottle of champers because he is a delight to watch. A man whose intelligence is both a blessing and a curse. Downley jr loses a few of the well known tics to bring about a Holmes whose not smug, but merely frustrated with the supposed challenges placed in front of him. This is a more jovial Holmes than I can think of, and it's the charm of the actor who plays him that brings it about. His foil comes in the shape of Jude Law who hasn't been this interesting since Closer. He craftily balances a character who is not only quite handy in a fight but is every so slightly a bit camp. There's a touch of effeminacy that tries to keep Holmes' man-child in check. It's all very humorous but it's also the reason why we care about what happens to them. At one point Holmes makes light that Dr Watson's career might be at stake but it's important to Holmes that it's not tarnished because of the relationship they have. It's these tiny things that build up the sakes in the film. It's a shame that Rachel McAdams's role is underdeveloped. It is also appears to be obvious that she is placed within the film as American draw to what is quite an English affair, because despite RDJ being transatlantic, has a nice enough English accent . Also, kudos to another solid Mark Strong effort he is the right side of slimy.
How about Richie tackling all this on his biggest movie to date? He handles it surprisingly well. After the deary Rock n Rolla, and Revolver (hated by everyone but liked by me), Richie is back to making bouncy British affairs which are made for cheeky smirks and wide grins. The film is filled with CSI edited clue finding and CGI set pieces. But Richie still manages to keep a sense of fun about the proceedings. At times it gives off the feeling of an old school Bond film, and while I may of offended a multitude of people by saying that I found it true, it has that sense of adventure about it.
That sense which was strangely missing from the big bright flashy lights of Avatar, a film that feels more like a feature to admire than to enjoy. Here we have the opposite, a film that wouldn't mind being called a flick. A film with a smart script that retains that popcorn munching feeling. I would say that Sherlock Holmes is more than elementary, but of course, this is not Paul Ross' blog site.
Note: I gotta say however, from Baker Street to Tower Bridge that fast? Really? You can't fool me guys.
Sunday, 27 December 2009
Review: Bronson
Year: 2009
Director: Nicolas Winding Refn
Screenplay: Nicolas Winding Refn, Brock Norman Brock
Starring: Tom Hardy, Matt King, James Lance
Synopsis is here
WARNING: This review has what could be considered slight spoiler in the last paragraph.
For a numerous amount of reasons, Bronson was a very slippery film for me to get to get hold of. So When I finally got hold of a copy I was actually quite pleased with myself, although I'm sure I could have done more in order to get a viewing of it. I'm actually very relived that I managed to see it, a few of my friends have managed to watch it before myself and they made damn sure I knew about it.
With this said will I enjoy the film as much as my friends? When one friend managed to watch the film in a cinema in Oxford (most likely the wonderful Phoenix) he went became absolutely besotted with the movie. And despite have similar tastes (I've never brought a copy of Fight Club because Ive stolen his) it's still very likely that I would have a polarizing view.
I didn't mind Bronson. In fact I found it to be quite charming in it's own chaotic little way. Refn's direction captures an intense and surreal insight into a Man who seems to find fulfillment in anarchy. Not only does he He find passion in hostility but it's hostility at it's most extreme. What makes a character like Bronson so interesting is that while most people would find living on the edge like this as absurd. This man not only thrives on it but make him appear so alive in comparison.
But what I enjoyed the most about Bronson was basing the movie inside the Man's head. When the words "based on a true story" turn up at the beginning of the film, you have to take the film with a pinch of salt. However by having the character of Bronson not only narrating his story but having scenes within a "neutral" performing space in front of an audience not only captures the surreality of Bronson's endeavors but also creates a unreliable telling of the story which, strangely, feels closer to the truth than any straight account of the story could ever do. It's not so much about the events and the reasons behind them, but more about the fact that sometimes life will throw up characters that us "normal" people will never be able to understand. We're not as extreme, so how do I know how they feel?
Playing the titular Bronson is Tom Hardy a young actor whom I had no idea about until I watched Rock n Rolla and saw adverts of Sky One's The Take. Hardy, a man that has battled addiction in his own life has been able to utilize that self-destruction to create an all consuming monster in Bronson. This is a performance that is not only pitched perfectly but also truly unnerving. Much as been said about Hardy's weight gain to play the part, but nothing has been said about the eyes. It's when you watch them watching you, unblinking and unfazed you see where the performance is. At one scene we Bronson wearing the well known rounded sunglasses that he is also known for and even then, a sense of fear is still installed despite not actually seeing those eyes, but merely KNOWING they are behind his shades, watching. It's a wonderful and yet disturbing moment and one that only few young actors could pull off.
Bronson hasn't got the best pacing and the films closing acting, while fun, is a little anticlimactic. But it's as a character study in which Bronson shines hardest. Likened to A Clockwork Orange, the film felt more like Taxi Driver to me. Where as A Clockwork Orange is about free will, here we see a film about rage at its most primal and unpredictable. The films final shot shows a caged, bleeding, wheezing Bronson glaring at the camera almost waiting to be let out. Like shaking a bottle of coke, when opened, it gets messy.
Director: Nicolas Winding Refn
Screenplay: Nicolas Winding Refn, Brock Norman Brock
Starring: Tom Hardy, Matt King, James Lance
Synopsis is here
WARNING: This review has what could be considered slight spoiler in the last paragraph.
For a numerous amount of reasons, Bronson was a very slippery film for me to get to get hold of. So When I finally got hold of a copy I was actually quite pleased with myself, although I'm sure I could have done more in order to get a viewing of it. I'm actually very relived that I managed to see it, a few of my friends have managed to watch it before myself and they made damn sure I knew about it.
With this said will I enjoy the film as much as my friends? When one friend managed to watch the film in a cinema in Oxford (most likely the wonderful Phoenix) he went became absolutely besotted with the movie. And despite have similar tastes (I've never brought a copy of Fight Club because Ive stolen his) it's still very likely that I would have a polarizing view.
I didn't mind Bronson. In fact I found it to be quite charming in it's own chaotic little way. Refn's direction captures an intense and surreal insight into a Man who seems to find fulfillment in anarchy. Not only does he He find passion in hostility but it's hostility at it's most extreme. What makes a character like Bronson so interesting is that while most people would find living on the edge like this as absurd. This man not only thrives on it but make him appear so alive in comparison.
But what I enjoyed the most about Bronson was basing the movie inside the Man's head. When the words "based on a true story" turn up at the beginning of the film, you have to take the film with a pinch of salt. However by having the character of Bronson not only narrating his story but having scenes within a "neutral" performing space in front of an audience not only captures the surreality of Bronson's endeavors but also creates a unreliable telling of the story which, strangely, feels closer to the truth than any straight account of the story could ever do. It's not so much about the events and the reasons behind them, but more about the fact that sometimes life will throw up characters that us "normal" people will never be able to understand. We're not as extreme, so how do I know how they feel?
Playing the titular Bronson is Tom Hardy a young actor whom I had no idea about until I watched Rock n Rolla and saw adverts of Sky One's The Take. Hardy, a man that has battled addiction in his own life has been able to utilize that self-destruction to create an all consuming monster in Bronson. This is a performance that is not only pitched perfectly but also truly unnerving. Much as been said about Hardy's weight gain to play the part, but nothing has been said about the eyes. It's when you watch them watching you, unblinking and unfazed you see where the performance is. At one scene we Bronson wearing the well known rounded sunglasses that he is also known for and even then, a sense of fear is still installed despite not actually seeing those eyes, but merely KNOWING they are behind his shades, watching. It's a wonderful and yet disturbing moment and one that only few young actors could pull off.
Bronson hasn't got the best pacing and the films closing acting, while fun, is a little anticlimactic. But it's as a character study in which Bronson shines hardest. Likened to A Clockwork Orange, the film felt more like Taxi Driver to me. Where as A Clockwork Orange is about free will, here we see a film about rage at its most primal and unpredictable. The films final shot shows a caged, bleeding, wheezing Bronson glaring at the camera almost waiting to be let out. Like shaking a bottle of coke, when opened, it gets messy.
Sunday, 20 December 2009
Review: Street Fighter: Legend of Chun Li
Year: 2009
Director: Andrzej Bartkowiak
Screenplay: Justin Marks
Starring: Kristin Kreuk, Chris Klein, Neal McDonough, Robin Shou, Moon Bloodgood, Taboo, Michael Clarke Duncan
Childhood fondness of the Capcom franchise and morbid curiosity brought me to watching this. There was clearly something telling me that watching this would be a bad idea, however, but the urge was just too strong. I had to see if this was a train wreck or merely a little misguided. By the time Chris Kelin utters his first line...I couldn't stop laughing. I was laughing because of Kelin's dreadful performance. I was laughing because of the films half baked storytelling. I laughed at many things I wasn't supposed to, but one of the main reasons I laughed is because if I didn't...I would have been in tears.
Legend of Chun Li is a bad movie. It's close to Uwe Boll bad. It is a film which has the Interpol having no idea how to trace the main villain Bison (McDonough voicing his role in his best Oirish accent) but anyone off the street can merely use an Internet cafe and gather ALL the information anyone would need on him. It's a movie in which the main character "seduces" a female for information with a atrocious dance moves set to a dire gangster rap soundtrack. It's movie that has some of the worst narration this side of Blade Runner. It's a movie... I could go on.
This is a film seemingly fueled by bad decisions. Considering most causal gamers stopped following the street fighter franchise around the Alpha series, why on earth did the filmmakers consider it to be a good idea to involve characters from then? With a story so simple, why do we need Kristin Kreuk to narrate the movie for us? Why do all the actors in this film have the same dead eyed look? You know, the kind of look that someone who sold their soul would have?
It's clearly obvious a deal with the devil was made for this movie. I mean how else could a Black Eyed Pea get a gig "acting" in this film? (There must of been dealings in X-men: Origins and Nine also). Another, more important questions abound include is how on earth does Andrzej Bartkowiak keep getting offered movies? Why does he edit the shit out of his (admittedly not bad) action sequences? If these questions can be answers please...tell me.
After my review of Avatar and it's clunky script, I feel I may have to apologize. Cameron's film has it's issues but at least it's enjoyable. This...this is an abomination against action movies, a crime against good storytelling, a waste of time and effort, simply put....a bad movie.
Director: Andrzej Bartkowiak
Screenplay: Justin Marks
Starring: Kristin Kreuk, Chris Klein, Neal McDonough, Robin Shou, Moon Bloodgood, Taboo, Michael Clarke Duncan
Childhood fondness of the Capcom franchise and morbid curiosity brought me to watching this. There was clearly something telling me that watching this would be a bad idea, however, but the urge was just too strong. I had to see if this was a train wreck or merely a little misguided. By the time Chris Kelin utters his first line...I couldn't stop laughing. I was laughing because of Kelin's dreadful performance. I was laughing because of the films half baked storytelling. I laughed at many things I wasn't supposed to, but one of the main reasons I laughed is because if I didn't...I would have been in tears.
Legend of Chun Li is a bad movie. It's close to Uwe Boll bad. It is a film which has the Interpol having no idea how to trace the main villain Bison (McDonough voicing his role in his best Oirish accent) but anyone off the street can merely use an Internet cafe and gather ALL the information anyone would need on him. It's a movie in which the main character "seduces" a female for information with a atrocious dance moves set to a dire gangster rap soundtrack. It's movie that has some of the worst narration this side of Blade Runner. It's a movie... I could go on.
This is a film seemingly fueled by bad decisions. Considering most causal gamers stopped following the street fighter franchise around the Alpha series, why on earth did the filmmakers consider it to be a good idea to involve characters from then? With a story so simple, why do we need Kristin Kreuk to narrate the movie for us? Why do all the actors in this film have the same dead eyed look? You know, the kind of look that someone who sold their soul would have?
It's clearly obvious a deal with the devil was made for this movie. I mean how else could a Black Eyed Pea get a gig "acting" in this film? (There must of been dealings in X-men: Origins and Nine also). Another, more important questions abound include is how on earth does Andrzej Bartkowiak keep getting offered movies? Why does he edit the shit out of his (admittedly not bad) action sequences? If these questions can be answers please...tell me.
After my review of Avatar and it's clunky script, I feel I may have to apologize. Cameron's film has it's issues but at least it's enjoyable. This...this is an abomination against action movies, a crime against good storytelling, a waste of time and effort, simply put....a bad movie.
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